The Maryland state legislature has a lot on its plate. Crime in Baltimore. Crumbling infrastructure. A tax burden that sends residents fleeing to Virginia like refugees from a dinner party gone wrong.
So naturally, a Democratic delegate decided the real crisis — the one keeping Marylanders up at night — is the tragic absence of tampons in men’s restrooms.
Yes, You Read That Right
State Del. Ken Kerr, a Democrat representing Frederick County, introduced House Bill 941, which would require every public restroom in every public building to stock “menstrual hygiene products.” And before you ask — yes, that includes the men’s room.
The bill spells it out with the enthusiasm of a bureaucrat who’s never questioned his own ideas:
EACH PUBLIC RESTROOM IN EACH PUBLIC BUILDING SHALL PROVIDE AN ADEQUATE SUPPLY OF: (1) HAND SOAP; (2) TOILET PAPER; (3) TOWELS OR OTHER HAND DRYING DEVICES; (4) WATER; (5) WASTE CONTAINERS; AND (6) MENSTRUAL HYGIENE PRODUCTS
Hand soap? Sure. Toilet paper? Obviously. Tampons next to the urinal? That’s where you lost the plot, Ken.
The Floor Session Was Even Better
During a House Floor Session on March 17, Republican Delegate Kathy Szeliga did what any sane person would do — she asked follow-up questions. Specifically, she wanted to know what “appropriately sized tampons” meant.
“What are appropriately sized tampons? I’ve never heard of such a thing. What do you consider appropriate?” Szeliga asked.
Kerr’s answer? “It just means that tampons are offered, no specific size.”
Glad we cleared that up.
Szeliga then pressed further, asking if the bill would require tampons in men’s restrooms at the Baltimore Ravens and Baltimore Orioles stadiums. Kerr confirmed that if it’s “a state-owned building,” then yes — the men’s room gets tampons too.
Picture 50,000 Ravens fans tailgating on a Sunday afternoon, stumbling into the restroom at halftime, and finding a tampon dispenser wedged between the hand dryer and the graffiti. That’s not a policy. That’s a punchline.
When Szeliga asked if Kerr had considered “an amendment to only put this in women’s bathrooms” — you know, where people who actually menstruate go — Kerr said “an amendment like that was not offered.” Translation: nobody even tried to inject common sense into this thing, and he wasn’t about to start.
The Quiet Part Out Loud
Let’s not dance around what this is really about. This bill isn’t about hygiene. Women’s restrooms already have these products or can easily stock them. The entire point of putting tampons in the men’s room is to blur the line between male and female — to codify the idea that biological sex is a suggestion, not a fact.
It’s gender ideology laundered through a hygiene bill. Slap “public health” on the label and hope nobody reads the ingredients.
Maryland residents, to their credit, weren’t all buying it. Some told WBAL-TV 11 News they “see no reason for it.” One person bluntly said, “It would be weird.” Because it is weird.
One resident, Susan, told the outlet, “I don’t see an issue with it. For me, it doesn’t seem like an issue that is a problem.”
Another resident, Marla Henderson, offered this logic: if a woman realizes she “doesn’t have any tampons,” her husband or boyfriend could grab some from the men’s restroom. So we’re rewriting state law and spending taxpayer money so your boyfriend can play tampon courier? There are easier solutions, Marla. They sell them at every gas station in America.
Where This Is Headed
Bills like this are test balloons. If Maryland passes it, expect California, Illinois, and New York to follow within six months. The playbook is always the same — pass something that sounds mundane, call anyone who objects a bigot, then expand the mandate. Today it’s public buildings. Tomorrow it’s private businesses. Next year it’s schools, and anyone who questions it gets a lecture from a twenty-four-year-old HR coordinator with a nose ring and a sociology degree.
Trump’s administration has been drawing hard lines on biological reality in federal policy, and this is exactly why. The moment you stop pushing back, the goalpost doesn’t just move — it sprouts legs and runs.
Ken Kerr didn’t write a hygiene bill. He wrote an ideology bill, wrapped it in toilet paper, and hoped nobody would notice. Maryland deserves legislators who solve actual problems — not ones who turn the men’s room into a political statement.