Lunchables are out of the National School Lunch Program after testing positive for lead, cadmium, and other questionable materials—a hard reality for Kraft Heinz, who aimed to make these processed packs a staple in school lunches. After just a year, schools nationwide are pulling these pre-packaged snacks, marking the end of this bizarre attempt to serve up plastic trays of crackers and cheese as “lunch.” Now, isn’t this just a typical story of corporate promises meeting the cold hard reality of what’s actually best for kids?
The iconic “Turkey & Cheddar Cracker Stackers” and “Extra Cheesy Pizza” Lunchables made their debut in public schools last year, with Kraft Heinz promising “a specialized recipe” with more protein and whole grains, a lower amount of fat and sodium, and larger portions. That sounds nice on paper, but Consumer Reports had a different story to tell. After testing the school Lunchables, they found high levels of lead, cadmium, and phthalates—yes, phthalates, those hormone disruptors we all want nowhere near our kids.
Lunchables are being removed from schools. Kraft Heinz sees the writing on the wall. Our movement cannot be stopped. The poisoning of our children needs to end now. #FoodBabeArmy @jessenewman13 @WSJ @RobertKennedyJr pic.twitter.com/Vh1vu72vkE
— Vani Hari (@thefoodbabe) November 13, 2024
In a statement to USA Today, Kraft Heinz admitted that the Lunchables school program hadn’t hit their sales targets. The company tried to play it off as just a routine shift in strategy, saying, “This happens occasionally across our broad portfolio, especially as we explore new sales channels.” But with Consumer Reports on their case, parents and health advocates were more than ready to see Lunchables go.
Brian Ronholm, Consumer Reports’ food policy director, couldn’t contain his joy over the news, saying, “We’re pleased that Heinz Kraft has pulled Lunchables from the school lunch program.” The group even started a petition to pressure the USDA to kick Lunchables off the school lunch menus. And apparently, they succeeded.
Predictably, Dr. Mark Hyman and Vani Hari, who have made careers out of hating processed foods, were all over this news. Hyman, a former Clinton adviser, chimed in, calling it a “win for public health.” Meanwhile, Hari, known for her anti-food-industry rants, declared this was a victory in the “movement” to end “the poisoning of our children.” Quite the dramatic flair, as always.
Kraft Heinz pulling Lunchables from school lunch programs is a win for public health!
Consumer Reports flagged high levels of sodium and lead—both harmful to kids' developing brains. Junk food has no place in schools. It's time to demand real food for every child. pic.twitter.com/iu3qBr5AcJ
— Mark Hyman, M.D. (@drmarkhyman) November 13, 2024
All this points to one thing: parents, advocates, and even some in the government are finally waking up to the nutritional insanity served up in the name of school lunches. Now, here’s the kicker—the solution to these problems isn’t hard. If schools can’t provide decent, nutritious food to kids, let the private sector and local organizations step up. And thank goodness we have leaders like Trump, who support more options and less government interference, which might just lead to real, healthy solutions instead of serving junk food with a fancy label.